Sunday, August 4, 2019


Last week I wrote about setting boundaries and this week on my facebook page I explored connecting with our values.   Being real and true about what is important to us is crucial when setting boundaries.  If I don't know what's important to me, I won't know what I want and need,  and I certainly won't be able to communicate those wants and needs to anybody else.
So what are values?
They are the driving forces behind our search for happiness and they are continuously reflected in our behaviour. If, of course, we are behaving from a place of integrity.  That is to say, in alignment with what is important to us.
Sounds rather obvious doesn't it.  "If it's important to me then of course I will behave accordingly!"
Well that is not always the way it goes.
Honesty, has always been one of my core values.  Being honest with myself and with others, is in my opinion essential to living a quality life.  But there was a specific time in my life, when I completely ignored this value. I won't get into the details of this experience, suffice it to say, it was an experience that taught me a lot about myself and others.  But, the point I am making now, is that for that period of time, I was not living in alignment with my value of honesty, and as much as I tried to push that truth aside it impacted my health, physically, mentally and emotionally.  We can deny our truths but our soul or higher self will not. And that denial will end up eating away at us in one form or another.
Were do these values come from?
We develop them over time through our experiences and how we interpret these experiences based on our innate characteristics.   They can definitely shift and change but there are some core values that remain relatively consistent throughout our lives.
Here is a list of possible core values from Brené Brown's book "Dare to Lead".
List of core values - Brené Brown
I invite you to pick your top 10 from the list and then use a worksheet similar to the following, to observe and consider how your values are reflected in your everyday life.  You can create your own worksheet, use a journal or email me at My email for a printable copy.
You can fill this out at the end of everyday, once a week, whatever works for you.  The important thing is to walk away with an idea of how your values align with your lifestyle.  You might want to change some behaviours or you might even decide that some so called values are not as important as your thought.  Just remain open and honest with yourself throughout the process.

What are some examples of how my behaviour was in alignment with this value?
What are some examples of how my behaviour was not in alignment with this value?
What changes would I like to make?

1. Honesty

I told my husband the truth about what I was feeling today and did it in a constructive and respectful way.
I lied to the telemarketer about someone being at the door.
I would like to be able to assert myself with telemarketers without compromising my value of honesty.
Create an awesome day!


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